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It is how people respond to stress that determines
whether they will profit from misfortune or be miserable.
~Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi~
I was thinking recently about Napoleon Hill’s statement that inside every adversity lie the seeds of an at least equal benefit. Good results can follow bad experiences. I have had times in my life when things looked quite bleak. Each time I learned something useful from the experience.
My wise friend, Steve D’Annunzio, has frequently reminded me that adversity, particularly in the form of illness, is God’s way of telling us there is something in our lives that needs attention. Judging by the magnitude of adversity piled on some of us, Big Ben must sometimes be necessary when we don’t pay attention to the snooze alarm.
Three people of my acquaintance have recently been diagnosed with cancer, one in the late stages. A good friend of mine is mired in serious depression. I wondered what the message is for them. As I thought about it, I realized I don’t have to understand their message. It is theirs, not mine. My job is to heed my own messages.
We are often too busy with troublesome emotions to hear the message. We may be angry at God for torturing us. Some of us, troubled by human suffering, have concluded that there could not be a loving God who would inflict such torture on His creatures.
Others of us become preoccupied with feeling sorry for ourselves. We look around and do not see others with the same problems as ours. Why should we have to put up with such troubles? It isn’t fair!
Still others of us are overcome by fear. What will become of us? How will we manage life with the burdens we have to bear? Will we ever be able to get back to our old selves?
If being angry, sad or fearful doesn’t help, what are we to do? The first step is to back off from our immediate emotional responses. We need to learn to be still within ourselves. Maybe that is part of the message. I heard somewhere that when God speaks to us, He/She does not shout but whispers. If there is too much noise in our minds, we can’t hear the message. Meditation, time in the woods or a prayerful attitude can all open our minds.
Once we are in a receptive state, what do we do with the message? Remember the seeds we started out with? Seeds are not very impressive in themselves. Given care, nurturing, and time, they can become giant redwood trees. People also start as seeds.
What wonders might be hiding in the seeds of the benefits awaiting us? Let’s consider an example. Someone I know ended up filing for bankruptcy. He entertained feelings of fear, sadness and depression. He was invited by people who cared about him to look at how he could start living his life with a sense of prosperity. Now he is doing better financially than he ever dreamed. He is not wealthy but has learned to respect money and himself.
Action Steps:
- How can I put aside my troubled feelings?
- How can I still my mind and heart?
- What do I hear when I start to listen?
- What new aspects of my life await me?
- Can I let go of control and let God be God?
Selection from my book, Navigating Life: Commonsense Reflections for the Voyage, available at Amazon